On the eastern shore of the great Lake Yb, two stagecoach routes tentatively touch, like embarrassed lovers; one destined for the parochial lands of the South and one for the heady and cosmopolitan Scaum Valley to the North. The lakeside town of Gaurian serves as the terminus for both routes. A band of southern ne'er-do-wells have been journeying along the coach road towards Gaurian for weeks, defrauding short-hop passengers and verbally tormenting the driver to pass the time, but they have now reached the end of both the line and the coachman's charity. Nothing short of good solid gold will do for the next leg of their trip, and the northward coach to Azenomei will not so much as turn a wheel without a minimum of ten terces in the coachman's wallet. Can the scoundrels join forces to preserve their northward momentum?
Dramatis Personae
Gyric, a purveyor of patent medicines (Paul)
Conry, a filthy but sunny-faced rustic (Gerald)
Unrass, a musclebound bellatrix (Amanda)
What we Encountered
- Gaurian, a town on the verge of winter, redolent with the smells of mud and charcoal smoke
- Eel traps, a clue towards the town's main source of protein
- Master Quondam, a rude merchant who really should be more careful with his moneypouch
- The Passionate Penguin, a family establishment turned to bawdy song-hall
- "The Captain's Wife had Forty Daughters", a longshoremen's ditty of interminable length and exceptional smuttiness
- Master and Mistress Klatsch, long-faced operators of the Penguin, desirous only of some quiet
- Grandmother Klatsch, enjoying a second youth in the company of two dozen burly maritime men
- "The Curse of the Eel", a strangely coherent pastiche of local lore invented by our heroes to disperse said revelers
- Eel pie, served up in giant steaming slabs by the grateful Master and Mistress Klatsch
- Rumors of an alchemist paying well for those who would row out into the lake to perform some task (not heeded by the heroes)
- Rumors that the town magistrate was the wealthiest man in the area (heeded very keenly by the heroes)
- Magistrate Kyphorrhinos, a roly-poly and easily distracted sorcerer who hired the heroes and then immediately had them arrested
- Four graybearded town guards, past their prime but nonetheless skilled at pursuing revenge
- A rumor concerning a fugitive being held in the town's small jail, soon to be released for lack of evidence
- An incarcerated pirate, who was more than he seemed
- An incarcerated ogre, who was also more than he seemed
- A happy conclusion to the night's events, which saw our heroes able to cover the cost of their onward journeys towards the Scaum Valley
